Begin with the end in mind
When you are making a plan, it is wise to begin with the end in mind, so that you know your target and goal. Applying that principle, let's take a look at what we are aiming at and praying for as we "bring them [our children] up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord" (Eph. 6:4, NASB). We'll begin by looking at this command from the Apostle Paul, which comes after he has given directions to children on the importance of obeying their parents.
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4
In verse 4, he focuses on Christian fathers and draws a stark contrast between two approaches to dealing with children. On the one hand, you have fathers who “provoke” their children. The Greek word for this is parorgizete, which comes from two words, para (alongside) and orgizo (anger). This particular form of the verb is used only here in the New Testament, in Ephesians 6:4. The picture it evokes is a father who “provokes" his children, meaning to deal with them in such a way that, knowingly or not, he pushes his children's buttons to the point where they are going to sin in anger. Perhaps you have known someone like this. Perhaps you have even been this parent from time to time? Have we not all, at some point, pushed our children too far, dealt with them too harshly, teased a little too much, allowed them to stay up too late, only to find them melting down in a hot mess of angry tears?
That is what Paul says we are NOT to do. On the other hand, he puts forth the picture of a believing father who is to "bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Let's look at those three key phrases and what they mean.
That is what Paul says we are NOT to do. On the other hand, he puts forth the picture of a believing father who is to "bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Let's look at those three key phrases and what they mean.